Who He Is

My friends always ask me how my younger son is doing amidst our continuing chaos and I always say that he's doing fine because he's an amazing kid and rarely complains. But I know he suffers and I'm sure, soon enough, he'll be in therapy like the rest of us.

He and his brother have grown a lot tighter these past few years, bonding over shared music and TV show taste, to say nothing of occasionally partying together. I've tried to grill him about his brother's shit and no matter how blatant or subtle I probe, he always has his back. In fact, a few weeks ago he told me how uncomfortable this line of questioning made him so I promised to back off.

I also promised to take him to the mall yesterday for new T-shirts and hoodies. And we were hanging out, talking about music (he's currently obsessed with early Eminem) and TV shows (we're both in love with the chick who plays Mia in Californication) and one thing led to another and he started talking about his older bro.

"I'll be happy when he goes away to college," he said matter-of-factly. "I love him and all, but I'll be happy to not have to deal with the drama." This was the first time he had expressed anything like this to me and I just nodded in understanding. Then we went to McDonald's and sat down in a back booth where he scarfed down a Big Mac while I tried to explain how I'm not going to be able to save his brother the next time he screws up and how much that hurts.

"It's not your fault," he said, sipping a Sprite. "It's who he is."

And at that moment, I had never been any prouder of who he is.